#Partnership Commitment

[drdarienzo]

Ready to Say 'I Do'? Assessing Your Psychological Readiness for the Adventure of Marriage!

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[kindaorangey]

"are you asking me or making me?" is soooooo interesting to me because i think armand only asks it when he can't gauge whether he's letting louis down. it's barely even sexual - it's a hail mary. it's a show of trust, indirectly admitting that he wants to do something other than what louis expects of him, but that he's willing to obey louis anyway, for the sake of their relationship. it's sort of heartbreaking watching them at the sacré-cœur, because if louis had said "i'm making you" armand would've done it in a heartbeat. he would've taken it as a show of committment on louis' part, and he wouldn't have betrayed him. but louis takes the question just as an expression of disagreement, and so he doesn't play the game. ironically, he respects armand's independence too much to make him turn madeleine if he doesn't want to. and so armand isn't convinced of louis' commitment to him, and he betrays him.

and by the time we see them in san fransisco, louis knows what the question means now, and answers "no, arun, i'm not asking" without question. and armand accepts it without complaint, even as it pains him. companionship really is the most important thing in the world to armand, just like it is for lestat, and he's willing to do any number of horrible things to louis and himself just to keep him as a companion, just like lestat. louis' biggest mistake is not realising how to use that to his advantage sooner.

[flora-tea]

It's so weird and messed up to me how society puts marriage on this pedestal as something we must aspire for as part of growing up, and how it's literally treated as something folks in committed long term relationships have to do in order to be "truly committed" or "truly serious" or "truly longterm".

Like why does a relationship have to have a legal contract involved that is sanctioned by and dissolvable only by the law to be considered valid and true?? Why do folks have to enter a legal commitment contract to be considered "actually truly for-reals serious" long term partners? Goverment's really gotta be in our business in order for us to be seen as fully adults or for partnerships to be seen as fully valid? You kidding me?? Society so weird for that fr 😭

No hate to anyone ofc, but the way marriage is largely considered an expectation for people and for partnered relationships is so weird and damaging.

[relaxxattack]

every time someone calls moirallegience just an alien qpr i wilt a lil like YEAH thats more or less the CLOSEST human thing but its also Literally Not That. like a qpr is fundanmentally not romantic and thats not even going into moirails whole Actual Purpose of calming ppl down. its just. aughhhhh pisses me off i see the confusion but, as aformentioned, aughhhhh

OH MY GOD THIS HAS BEEN BOTHERING ME TOO.... but i don't want to get petty at the people in my notes always saying "moirails are QPRs!" because in some ways that is the closest human thing so it's hard to be mad...

i think there's definitely some overlap in some ways. but NOT because moirallegiance and qprs are the same at all really, but INSTEAD because both relationships have unconventional boundaries defined by the people within them.

you know... like every relationship.

like the only reason the two have overlap is because they are both partnerships that emotionally care for each other but can choose to not bang (which is true for any romance anyway, even if it's considered abnormal). they're both just romances* that are unconventional to human norms, which makes people view them as the same thing when they're not.

i think the REAL issue here is that humans insist on using human words to understand things that are just, fundamentally, alien. can't we just appreciate alien romance for being... alien romance?

no, it's not platonic, it's romantic. it's just romantic in a way you aren't quite wired to understand, is all.

*in generalization, most QPRs are not romantic, because they are made up of aroaces who are life partners in a non-romantic way. however i want to disagree with you that none of them are romantic, because that is up to the partners in question.

[linseedling]

Bringing this pair back for a mini comic and trying to redesign them slightly to get them to look more like their respective species (pine marten and desman).

[jumpscart]

i think its wild that so many people run to "platonic marriages/unions should exist for aroace people!" over "people should be able to live as an independent person alone in their household and still have lifelong friends and financial stability"

[starzalign]

Everytime I see a jupiter nak women w a ketu nak man a part of my soul dies

She should be with someone that understands her passion and gives; rather than a man thats draining and tries to restrict her being. Sun & Jupiter nak men are great for us tbh. I’d actually venture to say Mars, Jupiter, and Sun naks are the best pairings for Jupiter naks regardless of gender.

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

[pinetreeshack]

woow boy why you so girl

[flores-desyatov]

I don’t think Vanya thinks any deep thoughts about social media tbh. Not like Bella anyhow. I think whatever he does do is mostly through Bella’s social media anyways 🤷‍♀️ I mean, I sub to him (and love supporting both regardless!) but he doesn’t post as much even on there.

☝🏽🙂‍↕️

[littlegreen]

the version of shannon and their relationship that eddie has created in his head is a fantasy. and he knows this but pointedly ignores it so he doesn’t have to commit himself to his relationships with women because he’s still “committed” to shannon. even though in reality he and shannon consistently struggled to be committed to each other in any real, serious partnership when she was alive. that doesn’t mean he didn’t love her and that he isn’t struggling to grieve her, all of that can be true at once.

[mamawasatesttube]

girl help. is there any real consensus on how to tag qprs on ao3??

[pynkhues]

fun rpf stuff aside (though I'm totally fine with whatever people believe as long as no one bothers actors in real life), does it seem to you like Jacob and Sam have an unusual friendship? Or am I, as a woman, just not well-versed in guy friendships? But it seems like everyone around them agrees that they have an unusual friendship too? Thinking of Eric talking about them every chance he gets lol, and Rolin saying that he wrote a scene into the script specifically for the two of them that came out of their bond. They just seem to genuinely have so much affection for each other and they express it openly, and they talk about how much time they spend talking, and that all seems so beautifully sincere and the opposite of trying to be macho or whatever. I love it.

Haha, I love it too! It does seem like they've connected on a pretty deep level.

I don't know, I don't know either of them of course, but I think there's probably a lot of factors at play. I think true creative partnerships can often be pretty intense and binding, and that does seem to be the way they've both approached their work on the show and how they've felt about building Louis and Lestat as both individual characters, and as the show's big, beating, bloody heart. It also seems to have influenced how they choose to be leads on set.

Crews will usually say that a culture on set starts from the top of the callsheet, which I imagine would be Jacob at 1, Sam at 2, and they both seem to take that seriously as well. Eric's talked about that, as you said, but Roxane actually talked about how much they look after each other and the energy they bring to set quite a bit in her interview with Autumn too, which was lovely. I've timestamped it here if you haven't seen it:

So yeah, I think how they've chosen to create together plays a role. I also think timing probably had a bit to do with it too. Jacob's joked a few times that he and Sam are trauma bonded, which makes sense given the casting process and filming s1 all happened during the COVID lockdowns, so it was a fractuous time anyway and they were probably in a cast bubble, which I imagine added to the sense of shared experience.

I also think it probably helped that they were in pretty similar places career-wise when they started on the show. They were both fairly established in their local contexts (Jacob in the UK, Sam in Australia), but less so internationally and I think that probably a) put them both on a level footing from the get-go, b) gave them both a shared sense of what this opportunity was, and c) that their professional lives have made this pretty significant change together.

Plus, y'know, they just seem to really like each other, which is a lovely thing. So yeah! I think their friendship is something special, and whether that's a result of their personalities, the context of the last few years, or something else, who knows? I'm just glad we get to watch the result of it, haha.

[thatqueergarbagerat]

Normalize wanting committed, non-romantic relationships that aren't QPR's or PLP's

[frommyfavoritebooks]

Life is about who is holding your hand and, I think, whose hand you commit to holding.

- Daisy Jones and The Six, Taylor Jenkins Reid

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

Something about “I’m pissed off you let me give you all that youth for free” as in pouring yourself into a person and getting nothing out of it you’d bargained for 😵‍💫

Just to be clear I’m not saying relationships are supposed to be transactional, I’m saying the allusion here is that it eventually felt transactional and she got nothing out of it